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Somethin' Ta Tell Ya

by Peeple Watchin'

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1.
'95 02:53
Sometimes I feel like a tied-up old dog all these nasty people they got bored of kickin’ sometimes I feel like I ain’t got nothing inside but this 80 proof fire and I wait for you, I don’t know why but I wait for you by the BU bridge. Might as well jump but that water’s real cold. Only way out of this place is getting old, and I don’t wanna wait forever. Might as well jump but that water's real cold. There's only one way to get out of this world, and I know I can't wait forever. Do you remember staying up all night drinkin off-brand cola in the TV light? Infomercials about getting ripped, talking about boys we’d want to kiss and we prank called the whole yellow pages, it was kinda mean kinda contagious. 1995 was all sparkle and fade. You're wearin' a suit now but I never changed.
2.
I ain’t no man and I never fucking will be! Your demands are a sad, disgusting joke. I’d rather fight back through all of your abuse than give in to the lies that you invoke. And when you come home wrapped up in your flag, don't expect me to cry ya got shrapnel in your head and that’s what you get for killing to fit in. Don’t ask don’t tell don’t think just be like them, don't ask don't tell don't think just be like them. Now you’re married to the state, your resume it can’t be beat. Now you’re buried at their feet. Assimilation complete.
3.
What's gonna keep me from wading out into the Charles with rocks in my pockets now? What's gonna keep me from drinkin down the whole bottle and walkin off the edge of the world. Take a train out to Revere beach. Feel the sand beneath my feet. See the junkies with no teeth, watch the waterline recede. In the back of a car staring out at the stars there was an ache in your chest, now you're alone at the bars that you loathed as a kid. Wondering whatever happened to the convictions that warmed us, but they laid the trap and we backed right in. Walkin off the edge of the world now.
4.
VHS 03:03
Found a VHS of the old band playing a talent show at the school gym, covering songs we grew up with. I guess not much is different. Can we still fuck this morning up with sour breath and punk haircuts before leaving behind friendships forged in convenience store parking lots? Just bury your privilege in shit jobs for another year. Too afraid to care. The future was vast and now it's past. Tensions builds before it dissipates 'cause good things run from those who wait. Ruin a friendship with a tongue slip and take pride in your mistake. A function of disgrace that fakes your heart out, wide-eyed at the fallout. Swimmin’ upstream for some meaning, left it bleeding at the breeding ground. So we carry it all inside of us for another year. And I can't even sleep from the words that you spoke when I was tryin to find just a glimmer of hope in someone who still cares, who might dull this despair, but it's my own fuckin' fault I ain't goin nowhere. And if i try to find it, is it somewhere inside me? If I try to find it, is it somewhere....
5.
Riff Raff 01:55
With my brand new pair of shoes and a backpack full of booze, I'm comin' to tell you, I got nothin' else to lose....
6.
Got nowhere to go got this red red wine, in the mornin' I got nuthin not even the time. Sugar in my stomach, skin crawlin with grime, only one i'm holdin' is this $2.99. Take a walk Charles river, collapse on the bench, hey scumfuck get lost 'cause I can't stand yer stench. When you fuck up you're fucked up it's fucked, you got no luck, watch the suits roll in and the buzz get spent hey. Goin' nowhere in JFC square. Feel the night air in JFC. Catch a beat somethin' sweet but it's just a false start, got a lead on the street but I don't wanna party 'cause I'm feelin' old used to being alone, no one to talk to and nowhere to go. Too many numbers and no one to call, too many windows not open at all. Left onto Franklin and a right onto Aldie, I stare through the chainlink as the trains pass right by me.
7.
Grow Slow 02:23
I don't wanna die but I don't wanna live in this body I was born in, in this world I can't forgive. They call it a performance, seems I forgot my line. I'm a rotting fruit I think I'm runnin out of time. I told you who I was, you said you saw it too. If I committed to that person could I really see it through? The only thing that's passing is my youth. Fortify my stubbornness and suffer the abuse. It's a long road with violence all around...it's a heavy load but I won't let it drag me down no. I never found comfort but I learned to read their cues. A copy of a copy of a copy no one ever knew. I see me in the mirror and sink into my guts. The reflection comes back clearer-- I'm just a stranger to myself. I told you who I was, you said you saw it too. If I committed to that person do ya think I'd see it through, 'cause the only thing that's passing is my youth. Oh no, alright, ya grow slow, yer alright. No no, alright. It's real slow. It's alright.
8.
It's the ones you can't take back that'll get you in the end. Staring into outer space, chewin on some old disgrace. And it's the void that can't be filled that's gonna fill you to the gills. You used to hold your head up high, now you're headed for the hills, and it's a long way down, it's a long way down. So tell Pa I'm sorry but I just can't fill those shoes, I inherited the loneliness without any of the clues. And tell Ma I love her and she did all that she could, and it's no one's fault but my own fault that I turned out no good, no no no no no..... It's the ones you can't take back that will haunt you 'til the end as you're wanderin the streets out just a-lookin' for a friend. Because the only friends you know are those familiar back roads. As each day withers to its end there still so little you can show, for all the ones....

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released January 16, 2013

Recorded and mixed by Will Killingsworth at Dead Air, Sep. 28/29, 2012. Mastered by Gebo. Artwork by Katrina. LP out now on Nervous Nelly Records, cassette out now via Reality Is A Cult.

Internet contact: smashitdead@gmail.com

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Peeple Watchin' Boston, Massachusetts

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